Women prefer not to be in relationship for some of the same reasons as men. The main reasons women would rather be friends are women don’t want to be hurt, women love their independence, and women are tired of settling for less. Yeah probably not a big shock to most of you but it is bigger than you think. Now how about we break it down and explain what this means.
First of all, women get hurt over and over again, so they are just tired of the same bs that men continue to do over and over. Men tend to have no respect for women’s feelings. Sometimes men can be so selfish. I do not know if men have an idiot button attached to the back of their neck, but something is not right. We do not have time to continue to get our hopes up for you to just let us down.
Second, guys are so possessive they want to be able to do what they want to but they do not want the woman to do anything. They act like they run you. I am not trying to be sitting at the house all day why you are at the basketball court with Jeff and Dave. There is such a double standard. Men feel they can go to the club and hang with their boys but feel like women should stay in the house. Yeah this is 2012. If you think woman is suppose to just be at home cooking and cleaning that is not going to happen.
Third, women are tired of settling for less. Why do women continue to lower their standards to be in a relationship? I personally need to be upgraded. I know my worth and I suggest you know my worth. Just because I do not give it up on the first date does not mean I am stuck up. I am not saying I need a man to make more money than me but he does need to have something going for himself. How about I call you to come over when I want or need some company.
Remember to Keep it GC,
Counselor Jessica
I concur with most of these points, but I would add that it’s not that women are afraid to get their hopes up. Women have been taking chances since the beginning of time. Giving someone a chance isn’t the difficult part. The problem is that even when men are given chances they choose not to take them. Much of this can be attributed to the fact that men really just have more options than women when it comes to dating. Simple math…we outnumber them. And to break things down even further, the number of women who are motivated, ambitious, and MATURE is higher than men with similar qualities. I’d argue that 95% of women want to be in relationships. But, when you’re surrounded by men who don’t want to take initiative, set a positive foundation, and respect a woman as a woman, it makes a relationship far less appealing. I think most men recognize that women are resilient, understanding, and independent. It would be foolish for any man to think that women only belong in the house when we have women running multibillion-dollar companies. When more people learn how to respect each other as individuals, unleash themselves from the pain of the past, and become more in tune with what they have to offer someone else, then we’ll start seeing the development of lasting relationships. But, as long as men keep playing games and not stepping up, and women keep allowing it by letting people who don’t belong take residence in our lives and hearts, the ridiculous cycle of nonsense continues.
Well that is very interesting. Typical woman response to this situation. I think woman need to stop looking at dudes and look at themselves in the mirror. Stop complaining so much. Take responsiblity for your tough. A womans tongue is so powerful. Start lifting us up. I am in corporate america and there are alot of woman around me but high quantity but quality is trash. That is why we might date around we trying to find potential not some over bearing woman that thinks she knows it all. I did learn something thouggh. Why women stay single.
Dave why my friend why? I know you want to give different perspectives and not be bias but come on man. Woman alway pointing fingers. That is there problem. If you think we are not changing or we changing for the worst what does that say about you? I had this long response I was going to say but I am not going to entertain everyone please! What is the part three? I need to see this. I know you dont blast woman but after this I think you should.
I will take that. I know that I want to be a better man. I want to be a husband one day so I am not easily offended by these words. I want to know how women feel. With that being said there is alot of finger pointing on this subject. It is not a woman’s fault I am not married it is mine. All my relationships were not bad. I chose to stay in the “Friend” zone that we are speaking on. I do not want to take away from part 3 so I will keep it short but I raise the question what have you done to better yourself for a life long relationship?
I pretty much agree with what you’ve said Counselor Jessica, but as Ms. Bella Reese has stated there are a few things I wanted to add… problem is she pretty much took care of that. As for women being hurt, we’ve done that and most of us with the goal to be a wife will continue to suffer through because the final result makes it all worth it. I don’t meet the guy who wants me to be at home “barefoot and pregnant” in fact I meet the guy who supports my educational and professional growth.
You show me a woman who lowers her standards to have a relationship; I’ll show you a woman who has allowed for the unnecessary shenanigans to occur in her relationships. I don’t have a problem with compromise, hell I hope someone can compromise with me, I’m not perfect. But when you settle, you have to turn the mirror on yourself and ask what you’ve allowed to enter your life. I say if you have a standard stick to it; there are standards that we see as deal breakers… then there are preferences… preferences are negotiable. Make sure you decipher the difference ladies…
As for the men replying to this post, I find it hilarious that you call this finger pointing. It’s a female perspective… accept your part and move the heck on. I can recall several women last week who took the male standpoint VERY WELL. And accepted their parts in a failed relationship; even agreed with EVERYTHING Counselor Jeff said. Let’s be real, this situation IS NOT one sided…
Counselor Dave, I do things daily to better myself for a life-long relationship. I work out because I’m asking for someone who is conscious of their outer person as they are their inner person; I am charitable and encourage men and women to reach their goals. I don’t tear people down and I work on knowing how to share and negotiate on ideas and suggestions. I try to be the person I’m asking for with room to grow;, but I’m passionate enough to stick up for myself and to my standards. I know this long but I had a lot to say…
Can’t wait for part 3…