Category Archives: Confessions

It’s Not Me

Have you ever been doing things that were wrong and not having no feelings of what you
were doing and no way to Stop? And during that time have you had to stop and ask yourself why
am I doing this? Or what is going on with Me? well in these scriptures here we find that Paul is
going through something similar himself. Paul has come to a dilemma within himself much like
most of us in our everyday life. He is struggling with the war within himself, his flesh is fighting
against his spirit. We are all carnal sold under sin, but the law is spiritual, see right the is the first
dilemma trying to live out a spiritual law in a carnal body. Just like oil and water don’t mix carnality
and spiritual laws don’t mix. When you have an environment like this you deal with things that
you may not understand, (verse 15 for that which I do I allow not), now how is this Possible?
what he is saying is that what he does, the things that he is doing, he allows not, then that’s
almost like he is in a trans or he is being controlled by another force. Now his body is fighting him
doing the things that he does not allow it to do, ,then he say the things that I would that I do not,
now he is fighting his body trying to get his mind and body to do what he wants and need it to do,
(the good things) , and the things that I hate (the bad things), that is what I end up doing. What is
it that has the man of God doing these Things? Well when you are doing the will of God there is
always evil present putting pressure on you to do the wrong thing. When you are in a bad state
you are in a trans like a puppet on a string wandering aimlessly out of the will of God. He is in a
spiritual tug of War from within and he has this struggle daily, and that’s why we have to ask for
forgiveness daily we need to be renewed constantly from minute to minute hour to hour and from
day to day. We can’t just walk around aimlessly without getting ourselves together. Verse 16
goes on to say that if I am doing the things that I would not then I consent it under the law that it is
good, but now that is one of the tricks of the devil, and making you think or feel that just because
you a mighty man of God or you are called to do a thing that when you Tripp up that if you do it it
must be good under the law. Also just because you have a good heart to do good it is not OK.
God don’t judge you by your intentions, and but he judges by your actions. Verse 17 goes to
conclude that (it’s not Me!) somebody say it’s not Me! Now then it is no more that I , but the sin
that dwelled in me, the conclusion is that if I am doing the will of God and I am trying to do good
then it must not be me doing these things but the sin on the inside of me, because my heart is
good, but my motives are good, but my actions don’t reflect, so what are you saying man of
God? What I am saying is This! You have to put on the whole armor of God so that you will be
able to stand against the wiles of the devil and having that being said you also have to stay
prayed up at all times because the devil is out there tempting your flesh, and he knows what you
like so he does what he know to trip you up. Having being a spiritual being, trapped inside this
earthly vessel there is always a war going on inside you, and how to perform that which is good I
find not. In my flesh dwelled no good things, It is hard to get your sinful body to perform good
deeds(verse 18). In closing we find that when you do well for God there is always evil present
inside of you even when you delight in the law of God and the devil tries to use sin to bring you in
captivity in your mind by constantly trying to bring you down the road to destruction!

Daniel Evans

Take God Off the Clock

This is a very familiar passage of scriptures here! We have two things happening here that I want to talk about, cause and effect. Jesus was hungry, he saw a fig tree and expected to receive fruit and there was none, being disappointed he cursed the tree and the tree died. Now before we go further we need to first understand who Jesus is and where he came from. Jesus is the son of God and he came to the world to preach the kingdom, and concepts in the kingdom are different than they are in the world. He also knew he was where he came and where he was going, he also had seen it all before and had his father to model it. When we look at Jesus we have to understand that Jesus did not come from here, but from the kingdom which knew no time. The kingdom of God is an everlasting kingdom according to Psalms 145:13 so we see that the kingdom of God does not deal with time and it exist before, during, and after time. People understand and operate according to how they were taught and or raised, so understand his attitude towards the tree. He stepped out of the kingdom where there was no time into a world that is very limited by time, and having understood what his restrictions were in the world, he still operated with a kingdom mindset. When you understand the kingdom of God is uninfluenced by time it makes sense for him to see a fig tree from afar off and seeing leaves for him to expect to receive fruit as well even though it was not the season for figs. We being from earth we understand time and seasons for what they are and we know that fruit comes in seasons so we don’t expect fruit if it is not the season for it, but Jesus cursed the tree for not having fruit because in the kingdom there is always fruit all the time. Now we understand the process of time as it relates to us and that by him cursing to tree then over time the tree would die, but because Jesus is not affected by or deals with time , the very next day when Peter saw the tree he noticed that it had withered and died in a day’s time. So what would have taken hundreds and thousands of years to happen happened the very next day, because in Psalms 1 it tells us that your leaves shall not wither and whatever you do shall prosper, so in the kingdom there is no such thing as a bad day. Now Jesus turned and told Peter to have faith in God, he told him that because whatever God says will come to pass, we know that faith comes by hearing and by hearing the word of God, so when he spoke to the tree which did not appear to have ears it had to obey the word of God. Your faith has to be in what God has said and not the time you feel should be allowed or the way you think it should happen or how it should happen. As Christians the greatest challenge to our faith is time, because the longer you wait on the promises of God the more opportunity the enemy has to speak to your mind, and began talking you against the promises. Time will cause your faith to waiver if your faith is wrapped up in your emotions, and locked into a timeframe you will have a hard time accepting the things of God and believing what he says all because you have put God on the clock. You already won’t serve God with or give God the time that he has given you, God Lords over time, so he has the power to suspend time and then the power to fast forward time. We have to learn how to be transformed by the renewing of our minds so that we are not conformed to time but operating with a kingdom mindset. When you pray for things God hears you and he drops it in your tomorrow instantly with no time restrictions, but because we put a time line on it, it always seems to take too long to receive it, so we get arrogant and accuse God and other people of lying just because it didn’t happen in a timeframe and we stop believing in blessing so we stop asking God to move on our behalf. Consider this if 1,000 years is as of a day to God then our 3,6,10 years of you so called waiting on God is a fragment of a sec to God, God has not forgotten about you, you just have to take God off the clock and operate with a kingdom mindset and walk in what you ask God for and receive it in your spirit so that it can manifest in the natural. In closing! Your praise monitors your faith, faith comes by hearing so when God speaks to you and you hear a word from him just respond in praise and see it manifest in your life. When you don’t see God’s promises through the eyes of the kingdom and you look at it through the eyes of time you get frustrated, disconnected, and your faith waivers, just take God off the clock!

Daniel Evans

Letter to My Son

father son
Where do I start? I want to let you know that I love you already and I’ve never met you in my life. I think about you all the time and I wonder if you will look like me, talk like me, walk like me. You are the reason that I do everything that I do now. I refuse to have you calling someone else your mentor, your hero or your father.

I cannot wait to see you take your first steps, say your first words, and give me a hug. I will not use excuses that I do not know how to be a father stop me from loving you and being there for you. See the thing is once you come into my life, you will be my priority for the next 18 years.
I am going to teach you how to be a man of God, a strong man, and a leader. I will show you how to tie a tie, bait your own fishing hook, and throw a baseball. Even as I write this I get tears of joy in my eyes because you are so special to me. I want to give you all that I did not have, while teaching you to appreciate everything that is given to you. You will know hard work and dedication and not be the product of a microwaveable society if I have anything to do with it.

It is my duty to teach you values, and respect for your elders, even if they are wrong. You have to understand your place as a child and know your place, but if there is a problem I will handle it. Make sure that you speak with authority. Make sure you look a man in his eyes when you are talking. When you shake a man’s hand make sure you grip his hand with confidence.

I cannot wait to see you play sports for the first time, I will be right there at every game that I can possibly be at cheering you on from the stands and proudly letting everyone know that is my boy.
I want you to be better than I will ever be. So if I am tough on you at times, that is only me showing you how much I love you. This is a tough world, so I need you to be ready for everything that comes your way. You are a Prince learning to become a King, in your own right.

I will be consistent in your growth. When the time is right, we will have a talk about sex; I will explain to you that one night you are going to wake up and think you urinated on yourself but there will not be any urine there. I want you come to me and talk about it so that I can help you understand what just happened.

Even though we haven’t met yet, I know it will be something special when we do. Adrian Taylor, Jr. has a nice ring to it. Before I end this letter son, there is going to be a time when you start getting involved with young ladies and if you ever have any questions on how to treat that special young lady, just follow my example of how I treat your mother and everything will work out for you.
Adrian Taylor Sr.


1212809078UjRwPhReference scriptures (proverbs 24:16-17)
For some of us redemption is hard to do, simply because we as christians have such unforgiving hearts. We love to kick a man while he is down, so to speak and never restore the man back to his original state. Who are we to judge and stand someone’s way of being redeemed. As christians it is our God-given duty to help a just man when he falls from grace. Let me give you the bible, proverbs 24:16-17 says that a just man falleth 7 times and gets back up again. We all fall down, but we get back up again, just don’t get into a habit of falling down, but when you or a fellow believer do fall don’t stay down and don’t let your brother stay down redeem your brother and help them with redemption, because you don’t know when you may be the one that Tripp up and end up on the ground needing someone to help you. A saint is just a sinner who fell down ,but didn’t stay down they got back up. When a just man falls it’s just a temporary slip or fall, but the wicked shall fall into mischief, the mischief is the lack of concern we have when our brothers and sisters fall, the mischief is the backbiting we do on each other when one of us falls, the mischief is the tearing down and the not building up we need to be doing. Whether or not it’s your brother you are watching or an enemy that you watch from a distance rejoice not when your enemy falleth and let not your heart be glad when he stumbleth. That’s another problem that I see in the church, we so jealous of others and some of us gets rejoice within ourselves and we are glad when we see someone who is prosperous and anointed fall and stumble so it’s hard to restore a man when you are glad that they are going through and when they have taken a fall. Also we as People have no problem restoring celebrity figures when they fall, whether it’s R.Kelly in court, Kobe Bryant, or Whitney Houston, we always find it in our hearts to forgive and restore them. When it comes to men of God we then want to be the judge and send our fellow saints to Hell when they fall. Whether it is Eddie Long who has fallen, or even if it is your own local pastor or man of God who has taken a fall you have a duty to restore and redeem them just as you would if they were celebrities. The problem is that when it comes to us we only want people to see the best, but when it comes to others we only can see the worst. I am glad that God is not like us because I have been down and out before, and the only reason that I am still here today, the only reason that I am not dead yet, the only reason that I got out of the prison that I was in, the only reason that I have not lost my mind, my marriage, my family, is not because I am so good and righteous and holy, in fact my life is still ragged, I am not worthy to do anything in God’s kingdom, but it’s not me, not because of my works, but only because God saw the best in me when everyone else around me could only see the worst in me. If it had not been for the Lord that was on my side I don’t know where I would be. Tha’ts what I like about God despite all you do that is wrong and sinful he will always see the best in you, because he knows what’s inside of you and he wants to see it come out. Be not deceived it’s hard to stumble when you are on your knees and on your knees is where God wants us, on our knees praying. Find comfort in knowing that if God has humbled you then he knows your strength, he knows what you can and can’t bear. On your knees is the safety place to be, because once you are down the only way to go from there is up. Amen!

Daniel Evans

The American Dream

As children we were taught to get an education, get a job, get married, and have a family, in that order. Now there are so many factors that stop this from happening for my generation. This country has been run into the ground by the baby boomers; the American dream is just what it says for my generation, a dream. I look at the government shutdown as an eye opening situation and our government is out dated. The doctrines that run this country are over 300 years old. Something has to change.

Hopefully with the government reopening this week, there will be some real changes. As a political leader it is your duty to do what is best for the American People. Right now, there is no chance for the younger generation to get ahead. You come out of college with $50,000 of debt that you need to pay back; this is before you get a job; once you have a job you probably will not even make enough money pay half of the monthly payments that Sallie Mae requires for you to pay. Your student loans are as high as mortgages at the age of 22. Sooooooooooo let’s get this straight, you are 22, making an average of $25,000-$32,000 salary, starting off$750 a month in student loans, you have not gotten an apartment yet, you are only making $1500 a month and half of that goes to student loans. How are the youth going to survive?

The rich get richer and the poor are getting poorer. Middle class America is becoming a dying breed. I think the thing that has made America so successful is the fact that we had a huge middle class in the 50’s – 90’s. As the years go by the economy is getting worse and worse. My generation and the generation after me do not have a life to live for. Education is not what it used to be. An education does not guarantee you success in this country any longer.

In order for our youth to survive, it is simple; as the people who make the choice of whom to elect, we have to take back our economy and start by selecting people that represent the people. Republicans love to scream about taxes being raised and abortion and Democrats love to scream about how benefits will be lowered and taxes will rise. I am tired of these guys not sticking to the real issues in our land because it does not matter who is in office; taxes are going to go up and down, it’s been that way forever.

I want the American Dream to be my reality. But if the government continues down the path of destruction, my generation will fail. It is time for politicians to have some young advisors because these guys are so out of touch with what we are going through it is crazy!

Adrian “GC Smooth” Taylor

Keep Your Friend Close and Your Enemies Closer

I have been hearing this quote my entire life and it is garbage. I do not agree with this statement at all. I think you should keep your enemies close and your friends closer. You know where your enemies stand; so you are not surprised by anything that they do. Now your friends they are the one that are plotting secretly against you and your dreams (so called friends). I’ve never been discouraged by a hater but my closest people have been able to make me feel like I’m less of a man or my dreams couldn’t ever become a reality. Haters motivate! You love your friends and you believe in the things that they are telling you.
Sometimes your friends do not have your best interest at heart. You have to understand which friends’ love you even understand your flaws. Now sometimes we can come to our friends with an off the wall idea that makes no since. Then you have to understand hate and a reality check. Let not get that twisted but we do have friends that are just negative and always downing our hopes and dreams. Get rid of them. They are no good for you. But first talk to them let them know that you do not feel like they are not being a great friend and also the key thing is you need to let them know why. The last thing that you want to do is lose a good friend but if they aren’t being much of a friend then you need to let them go. Some people are in your life for a season.

Remember to Keep It GC,
Adrian “GC Smooth” Taylor

Momma I Just Want to Dream


I remember being 3 years old and never believing there was a Santa Claus. As much as my teacher or other adults around me tried to tell me that he was real, I never believed in him. There were a lot of things that I just did not believe in as a child. See, I never had the luxury of fantasizing or that believing anything was possible; I was taught the realities of life. I knew what real life was and the people around me did too; dreaming was not something we did. I was taught I was great but never to think outside the box. We knew way too much and started so early having responsibilities that we never believed in anything beyond what we saw. One thing that we knew was there was going to come a point you were going to need to make money and live your life. No more parents to lean on.
I believe you need to expose your kids to real life situations but you also need to make sure that a child stays a child during his/her childhood. I was over exposed to violence, sex and drugs. How do you tell a child to be a kid when he/she is 10 years old watching their cousins smoke crack? I was scared out of mind. What if they try to make me smoke? I am a child, I’ve heard about people smoking crack and even called someone’s mother a crack head but I did not know what that meant. As much as I wanted to be a man I was not ready for the things I was faced with. I just wanted to be a child and dream about riding my bike playing cops and robbers. I wanted to think about playing baseball with my friends.
When people are always telling you to be a man when you are child, it sets you up for situations that you cannot handle; a child should not feel the need to have to pay his parents’ bills. When you bring a child in this world, you should make them your world. Too many of our children are 12 years old and are more worried about when they are going to get a job , than finishing their homework . It affects you when you become an adult; I never had the chance to take chances as a child. I had too many people depending on me to be better and do better. Some of the decisions I made were not for me, they were decisions based on what people thought I should do or should be; I just wanted to dream.
In some ways this still affect me as a man. Everything that I do is safe from my investments, career, and how I love. I do not want to take a chance and live a little bit. At times, I can be super tight with my money; I just never know when someone is going to need something from me and sometimes other people’s responsibilities even seem to become my own. It is difficult when hard work and dedication has been taught are the only ways to be successful, but what about working smarter and networking. I am trying to learn how to live and watch life instead of letting life watch me. I am dreaming now………

Remember to Keep it GC,
Adrian Taylor

Light Skin VS Dark Skin

light skin

I know that we, Black people, joke around about the differences between being light skinned and dark skinned, but I hope in everyone’s heart it is truly just a joke.. Hey, I have made jokes about it before myself, but in my heart it does not matter if you are light skinned or dark skinned, at the end of the day we are all Black. We have to look in our community and start to take responsibility for our own actions. It has been over 300 years since Willie Lynch gave his speech on the bank of the James River and he still proves that if you can divide us, you will conquer us. I want to share, with you, a little bit of his speech.

“I HAVE A FULL PROOF METHOD FOR CONTROLLING YOUR BLACK SLAVES. I guarantee every one of you that, if installed correctly, IT WILL CONTROL THE SLAVES FOR AT LEAST 300 HUNDREDS YEARS. My method is simple. Any member of your family or your overseer can use it. I HAVE OUTLINED A NUMBER OF DIFFERENCES AMONG THE SLAVES; AND I TAKE THESE DIFFERENCES AND MAKE THEM BIGGER. I USE FEAR, DISTRUST AND ENVY FOR CONTROL PURPOSES. These methods have worked on my modest plantation in the West Indies and it will work throughout the South. Take this simple little list of differences and think about them. On top of my list is “AGE,” but it’s there only because it starts with an “a.” The second is “COLOR” or shade. There is INTELLIGENCE, SIZE, SEX, SIZES OF PLANTATIONS, STATUS on plantations, ATTITUDE of owners, whether the slaves live in the valley, on a hill, East, West, North, South, have fine hair, course hair, or is tall or short. Now that you have a list of differences, I shall give you an outline of action, but before that, I shall assure you that DISTRUST IS STRONGER THAN TRUST AND ENVY STRONGER THAN ADULATION, RESPECT OR ADMIRATION. The Black slaves after receiving this indoctrination shall carry on and will become self-refueling and self-generating for HUNDREDS of years, maybe THOUSANDS. Don’t forget, you must pitch the OLD black male vs. the YOUNG black male, and the YOUNG black male against the OLD black male. You must use the DARK skin slaves vs. the LIGHT skin slaves, and the LIGHT skin slaves vs. the DARK skin slaves. You must use the FEMALE vs. the MALE, and the MALE vs. the FEMALE. You must also have white servants and overseers [who] distrust all Blacks. But it is NECESSARY THAT YOUR SLAVES TRUST AND DEPEND ON US. THEY MUST LOVE, RESPECT AND TRUST ONLY U. Gentlemen, these kits are your keys to control. Use them. Have your wives and children use them, never miss an opportunity.

This is so powerful and I think this sums it all up. I could give you a bunch of statistics, but for what? We know how low the marriage rate is in the black community; Black women have lost all faith in Black men; Black men are frowned upon for speaking a certain way, I could go on and on. We can only use slavery as an excuse for so long. I guess we need to adopt the values of our predecessors from the 50’s and 60’s, meaning the only way our community will begin to thrive again is if we feel like we are fighting for something. It is sad that this is the progress we have made over the years; killing each other like animals to claim a block that we do not even own. When you know better, you do better. Let’s do better!

Remember to Keep It GC,

Adrian “GC Smooth” Taylor